FIRST DAYS..PART FOUR

AFTER MEETING MYSELF!, I REALIZED THERE WAS NO NEED TO KNOCK ON THE DOOR OF 3509 AND ASK FOR NEWSPAPER DELIVERY TO START.  I REALLY WANTED TO TALK TO MY OWN PARENTS BACK THEN, BUT THAT PREMISE WAS GONE.  I HAD TO DO MUCH COUNSELING OF MYSELF IN ORDER TO NOT BLOW IT AND BE RETURNED TO THE HORRIBLE TIME IN 2012.  THE MAIN AREA OF CONCERN WAS 3509....I HAD TO FIND OTHER INTERESTS AND LET THINGS DEVELOPE.  IT HIT ME LIKE A JOLT...THIS WAS APRIL OF 1952.....A FEW MONTHS LATER, A GREAT QUAKE.  THE TEHACHIPI QUAKE WHICH WOULD KILL A GOOD NUMBER OF PEOPLE UP IN THE VALLEY....I REMEBERED MY CHARGE...."YOUR ONLY CONCERN IS YOURSELF...DON'T MEDDLE"   OF ALL PLACES THAT PLAYED A VERY GREAT EMOTIONAL ROLE IN MY LIFE WAS MARK KEPPEL EMENTERY SCHOOL DOWN ON GLENWOOD ROAD.  THAT SCHOOL DID MORE TO SHAPE ME THAN JUST ABOUT ANY OTHER THING.  IT WAS A GREAT OLD SCHOOL SCHOOL.  KIDS LEARNED FROM EXCELLENT TEACHERS AND CHALK ON BOARD, PLUS MANY BOOKS SUCH AS 'MAC AND MUFF' AND "HOW MANY HOW MUCH"   TO THIS DAY, I DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY I WAS A NERVOUS WRECK FROM FIRST GRADE UNTIL ABOUT THE FOURTH GRADE.  AT THAT AGE, I HAD NO TOOLS TO WORK WITH IN TERMS OF PUTTING THINGS INTO CONTEXT.  THE BEST WAY I CAN PUT IT IS THIS:  HOW WE DID WOULD DETERMINE IF WE LIVED OR DIED !   THE TEACHERS WERE GOOD, UNDERSTANDING, BUT DEMANDING OF EXCELLENCE.  I REMEMBER MANY TIMES STARING AT THE CLOCK....LOOKING LONGILY OUT THE WINDOWS AND LONGING FOR HOME AND MOTHER. SOMETHING ABOUT THE LUNCHES MAMMA FIXED AND WHERE WE ATE THEM...UNDER A SHELTER WITH ALL SORTS OF KIDS..EATING THEIR LUNCHES.  HOW  HAPPY AND SO TOGETHER THEY SEEMED..AND THAT MAY HAVE BEEN THE EMBRYO OF MY THOUGHTS THAT I WAS DIFFERENT..NOT ONE OF THEM....I CAME OUT OF THIS IN FOURTH GRADE, AND BECAME VERY POPULAR..INVITED TO MANY BIRTHDAY PARTIES....AND....HAD MY FIRST EXPERIENCE OF INTENSE EMOTIONS TOWARDS THE OPPOSITE SEX.  MY FIRST GIRL FRIEND!  SHE MUST HAVE BEEN THE AGRESSOR, I DID NOT HAVE IT IN ME TO BE.  HER NAME WAS JEANETTE...SHE MUST HAVE PASSED ME A NOTE..AND I PASSED ONE BACK..  SHE WAS VERY CUTE, BUT NOT BEAUTIFUL....SHE HAD AN AIR ABOUT HER THAT SEEMED TO SAY SHE KNEW THINGS NOBODY ELSE KNEW.  SHE MADE ME NERVOUS.  ONE DAY AFTER SCHOOL, SHE INVITED ME TO HER HOUSE WHICH WAS RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET FROM THE SCHOOL.  FROM THERE, WE WENT TO HER BEST FRIENDS HOUSE AND BOTH  SANG FOR ME.  JEANETTE WENT FIRST WITH BUTTONS AND BOWS.  MARY JEAN WENT SECOND WITH ANOTHER SONG.  I CHEERED WILDLY FOR JEANETTE. AND WHEN MARY JEAN WAS THROUGH WITN HER SONG....TOTAL SILENCE, I CAN STILL SEE HER DROP HER HEAD AND POUT.  ACTUALLY. SHE SANG WONDERFULLY, I JUST DIDNT WANT TO MAKE JEANETTE MAD.  TO THIS DAY, I REGRET MY RUDENESS.    (MORE TO COME)