Robert E. Fishback PhD....Psychology

After I hung up the phone, I leaned foreward and put my head in my hands and thought.  I thought of Mr. Key; the best friend I ever had bar none. I thought of the year I spent in counselling due to extreme depression due to the loss of two very special people in my life.  My grief turned into an anger that drove me to study and defeat the giants of tests that were always a part of High School and College.  I not only answered questions, I added footnotes from the extra knowledge I had from reading.  That is why I wear glasses.   I left High School with a straight 4.0 G.P.A   After obtaining my B.A and M.A, i received my Ph.D in Psychology at  the University of Illinois - Urbana - Champaign.    I had begun to realize  God  shapes our lives to His own good pleasure and we are not even aware of it.  Instead of moving a fish to another part of the aquarium, He picks up the whole aquarium and moves it so we have no idea we are traveling in another direction even when we are.  I thought of Mr. Key's uncanny wisdom in the timing of what he said and what he did.  In retrospect, I now understand. back then it seemed like hodge-podge.  I do not know the Mother who just called, nor do I know her son.  I wondered what God had planned for his life.  I wondered what God had planned for me as He might use me to to move this young man's aquarium.  If this young man turns out like I think he might; all I will do is what Mr. Key did.  I sure miss that man even after all these years.  I am still single.  I have looked in the best of places and to be honest, I just could not find her.  I am happy enough as things are.  Even at only 42, I feel tired inside.  I even see some grey in my hair. I have to keep a balance because I deal with alot of heavy stuff.  My business is successful; I chose the right town for business...alot of..disturbed people here and the endless grey and chilly days in Summer does not help.  I found a strange cure for myself.  Once a year I take a short vacation and go to Death Valley in June.  I am like the man who sits with  one foot in boiling water and the other in ice water....on the average, he is comfortible.  I enjoy my flat in the tenth floor of a rather trendy and very nice condo.   Lovely view when the fog isn't in.   I tend to be melancholy and really have to keep my mind on the present and not that wonderful day followed by horrible news.  I do have my ways of coping; the loved ones who died have not moved out, they are just in the next room.  I am really looking foreward to Saturday and the boy who has all the earmarks of me when I was a kid.  (to be continued)