TEACHING BOB TO WOO SESSION ONE

I had a telephone conversation with (what shall I say)  Bob's Father, my Father...about the latest developments regarding Bob.  They have been so trusting with us and I felt it important to have frequent updates with him so as to maintain his confidence.  He really appreciated that and told me I could communicate so well with his son where he could not.  I had arranged one of our back yard talks with Bob and he showed up on time at about seven in the evening.  I let him talk about anything he wanted to at the first,  He began by talking about wooing.  In the course of the conversation, he filled in some blanks that I needed more feedback on.  He had very deep resentments that he was not accepted as he was.  This anger fueled his determination to be himself and to  reject the unrelenting determination to be made into another's image and likeness.  In one of our prevuous conversations, he spoke of a horrible event between him and his Father when he was about six years old.  It was a Saturday afternoon and his Father had taken him to a matinee at the Atwater Theatre.  He had some change in his pocket and in his excitement about doing something for his Father, he ran ahead and bought two tickets.  His Father asked him where he had gotten the money and when he could not remember, his Father accused him of stealing.  He told me it was the worst memory in his life and it was the first time he felt dirty inside.  Bobby was a person in hiding....afraid to let his emotions and real thoughts be known to any other person.  This served as a great barrier to what I was going to tell him.  I was going to tell him that he must change some things:  get his very long and greasy hair  cut and stop trying to look like a punk.  I was going to tell him he needed to quite wearing black leather jackets and those black engineering boots with horse-shoe taps.  He was going to have to quit lighting a cigarette and let it dangle in his mouth when it was time to impress or intimidate another of his "kind".  I was going to have to have him decide which he really wanted:  to impress and attract Jeanette, or whether to continue on with his "love me or go to hell" attitude. .....PRAY FOR ME !  (to be continued)